TGIF

Thank the Lord and all of His shepherds that it is Friday!

And it may be Friday the Thirteenth, but I'm not really feeling that unlucky. I even saw a black cat today. Weird.

I only spent four hours at school today, due to a 12 p.m. dismissal. Early dismissals usually come with this very energized atomsphere, this feeling of recklessness similiar to the feeling you get when it's the end of May and summer is just out of reach. Nineteen minute class periods are perfect. You’re there just long enough to get settled in for another twenty-five minutes of boring lectures and notes, when suddenly, the bell rings and you’re off to a different classroom. Perfect!

I ate my usual breakfast, forcing laughter at the ridiculous things Jordan was saying to me. My Chemistry teacher managed to make me look stupid in front of the class, calling on me when my mind was miles away.(Usually when students are completely lost, they have someone whispering the answers to them. For some reason, I never do) But Floyd, David and I all laughed about it later, talking about how she is completely psycho. I walked with Jordan to fourth period, and we talked while we waited for our buses. I have the feeling I am slowly pulling him away from the strange infatuation that an alarming number of boys develop toward Ginny, but maybe it’s just an illusion. Or maybe they’re just friends after all. Maybe he’s realizing how stupid she really is. (Seriously, what kind of girl asks a guy "Don’t your skinny jeans squish your penis?" is that supposed to be flirty or something? Even I know better than that)

Sometimes I wonder if wishes really do come true. My friend Lucy and I were in the lunch line together and happened to look up at the clock on the wall at 11:10. We watched closely until 11:11 and made our wishes. She probably wished for something humble and important, because that's just the kind of girl she is. And there I was, greedily wishing for everything to work out with Jordan. Will my wish come true? But dreamer or not, I think I’ve realized that my dreams won’t come true if I sit around and wish for them to.

I have to make it happen, and I'd like to believe that I've already started trying. Could it be working? After lunch, I walked by him and I saw the slightest smile on his face when he saw me. I returned the smile and pondered if he had been smiling because of me. That moment gave me a shred of hope, a chance to stop and wonder if this bad thing is actually just an illusion, if I’m making a mountain out of an anthill. Maybe all this Friday-hype is giving me these weird, optimistic ideas.