This year, I’m more into the whole "holiday spirit" thing than usual. Or maybe over the months in between, I just forget what this feeling is like. It’s strange. Everything just seems better covered in lights, wreaths, and red and green decorations. But, in the advanced, modern world I live in, Christmas went from a celebration of smiles, miracles and giving to a holiday of money and greed.
Parents dread Christmas, especially parents with no money like mine. Little kids make long lists of toys for Santa. Teenagers buy two tons of clothing, replace their phones, cameras, iPods, and game systems with newer, better models.
Hundreds of Christmas songs on the radio constantly. Pictures with Santa Clause. Ham for dinner. Putting out milk and cookies. Trees in living rooms. Lights on the front porch.
It’s all just a celebration for Jesus being born in a stable. Yet, so many people don’t even care about that. They just want their presents, their money, their Christmas cards. But Christmas is so much more than receiving. It’s believing. It’s giving.
Though it’s hard to believe, Christmas is still full of surprises and miracles, little reminders of why we are celebrating. About a week ago, I came home from the mall where I had been picking out clothes at Boscov’s and Hot Topic for Christmas. I was talking to my mom while I was taking off my coat, and I noticed the two baskets sitting in front of the television, both in large pink bags.
"What are they?" I asked, pointing at them.
Then, my parents told me. A stranger who knew my Girl Scout leader had bought boxes and boxes of food for my family. They had bought my mom a twenty-five dollar gas card. In the baskets were things for my sister and I, from bath products, to cookies, to fake nails, to iTunes gift cards.
Someone had actually went out and bought things for my family. My family, struggling just to live in stability. I don’t know if I’ll ever know what it’s like to simply have everything I want handed to me, but now I know how it feels to be on the receiving end of charity. It gives you a warm feeling, but at the same time, you kind of realize, "Wow, I really am that poor." It hit me hard, because after a while, you just forget. You forget about how your dad hasn’t had a job for a few years. You forget that the reason your mom isn’t home as much is because she’s working two jobs. You forget that the government buys your food. You forget that your Nana lets you live in her husband’s parents’ old house for free. You forget that that same Nana pays the phone and computer bills. You forget that you’re struggling. You just live. You move on and keep living, keep acting like your life is just normal. You act like everything is fine. Sometimes, it seems that way, surprisingly.
After getting those presents, my family and I seem to be enjoying Christmas more than we usually do.
I already know what I’m getting tomorrow morning, seeing that I just wrapped my own presents earlier today. But, there’s something I wanted to do, an idea stolen from Alexandria’s blog.
In one of her posts, she wrote a letter to Santa, just like a little girl would do. I only have four minutes until Christmas, so I’d better get working.
Dear Santa,
Wow, it’s been a while. I don’t know if I’ve ever written you a letter before. I know I’ve made you lists, but I don’t remember writing letters. So, when you’re going through all of those letters, don’t forget to look at mine. I know I’m a fifteen year old girl who doesn’t exactly believe in you, but there are some things I’d really like for Christmas this year, the kind of things I won’t find under my tree.
2.) I want Jordan under my mistletoe. Or at least to be my boyfriend.
3.) I want my friends to get along with each other and be happy.
4.) I want to change, in a lot of ways.
5.) I want to eliminate the haters in the world. Can you please kidnap them and turn them into elves so I never have to deal with them again?
6.) I want to be happy. I want my family to be happy. I want everyone around me to be happy.
Sincerely, that pesky dreamer girl with the blog.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good night.
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